Monday, October 28

GANGPLANK PUBLIC HOUSE HIRING

SOUGHT:

TRUSTWORTHY BARTENDER
Must be able to pour and mix drinks, serve patrons, and occasionally sneer to make them feel seen. Must also be willing to wipe counters, mop floors, and clean the unmentionable places in the bar. Long hours.

BAKER & CHEF
Must be willing to wake before dawn to purchase the freshest ingredients from the market, to prepare recipes to owner's specification, keep the ovens fired, and maintain a tidy kitchen. Aspic or gefilte fish will result in immediate dismissal.

ORDAINED CLERIC
To bless a rebuilt bar. Must provide own wine.

BOUNCER
Must be able to drive unsavory types from the bar and see to its general security. Must also safeguard confidential documents in the office and execute other top secret activities as assigned.

***All staff must be willing to maintain the privacy of the owner. They must not reveal her location to any old women with white hair and smelling of mothballs.***

PAY
Room & board, a small stipend, and tips. May choose from available apartments above the bar. No loud music. Pets must be approved.

Please inquire with Miss Jumper Ginsburg at the Gangplank Public House, Clockhaven, NB

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