DIED

BECKLES — after a most unfortunate accident.  Mrs Octavia Beckles, née Gloomp,  a member of the New Babbage League of Social Welfare and Reform, died earlier this week after slipping on ice on her way to a service call.  She is survived by her husband Waldo, her strange daughter Willow, and a cat named Irony.  Service will be held at the Cathedral of the Builder this Friday, officiated by Father V Vorpal.

BUNN — in agony, due to spider bite(s).  Benjamin Bunn, relatives unknown, was attacked by spiders and succumbed to either venom or blood loss.  Funeral will be held on Friday, officiated by Tepic Harlequin.

CONNER — death by misadventure.  Mr Conner, first name unknown, was found dead on an incoming train to New Babbage.  He is thought to have died by poisoning.  He will be buried in pauper's grave.  No funeral service.

DOE — in agony, due to spider bite(s).  Junior John Doe, birth name unknown, was attacked by spiders and succumbed to either venom or blood loss.  He will be buried in pauper's grave.  No funeral service.

FRANKLIN — suddenly, in Coronet Gardens.  Harland Franklin, pugilist, died earlier this week after ingesting seventeen glasses of Foggy Dew at the Bucket of Blood.  He is survived by his mother, Mildred Franklin, and a monkey named Waldo.  Funeral will be held on Monday at the Cathedral of the Builder, and will be officiated by Father V Vorpal.

WALLACE — death by misadventure.  Mr Wallace, first name unknown, was found dead on an incoming train to New Babbage.  He is thought to have died by poisoning.  He will be buried in pauper's grave.  No funeral service.