Sunday, January 6

Brain Stolen From Corpse



NEW BABBAGE, NB — Obeisance for the bereft of life seems to be an antiquated conceit of yore, as the corpse of Penn NameWitheld might be able to confide to you.  The 19 year old was savagely murdered recently, but adding insult to eradication, the brain of the corpus delicti was recently discovered to be vanished completely.

The grisly discovery of Penn NameWitheld's body near Windmill Pond, north of the Palisade Wall, was the primogenial in a string of murders which has recently assaulted the city of New Babbage: in the pandemonium surrounding the rapidly multiplying corpses, his body was temporarily neglected and left to lay in the rapidly accumulating precipitation.  By the time authorities arrived to collect the body, the skull was discovered to have been in a state of acute trephanation.

There were no witnesses to this ghastly crime, and there are currently no named suspects.  Investigation is on-going.  The current whereabouts of the missing brain are unknown.

Citizens with information are asked to report promptly to Terranova Investigations on Merryman Way in New Babbage.  For funeral information, please contact Jefferson Way Mortuary.

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