Wednesday, January 23

City Rife With Political Insubordination




NEW BABBAGE, NB — Following the statement calling for citywide curfew made by acting mayor Mr O Underby — in lieu of Clockwinder Tenk, who is still unaccounted for — the city has erupted into outrage and indignation.

Citizens responded to the statement in a myriad of disparate manners, many by boldly marching en masse into the streets after dark, some by painting incendiary graffito on the walls of City Hall, and prominent hotelier Mr V Mornington issuing a stern ultimatum to the acting mayor.

Several arrests for curfew breaking were made, including a report that Her Royal Highness, Queen Victoria, of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland, Empress of India, and Defender of the Faith, was amongst those incarcerated in makeshift holding cells.

Assaults and beatings by the ad hoc night patrols were also reported.  A feline, who identified himself only as Joojoo, described the scene he witnessed thusly, 'Sticking to rooftops I got a grand view of the chaos. Watched a gang of the night watch beat up a drunk until he spewed across the cobbles.  Jolly good fun.'  When asked what he thought the final outcome of this misery might be, the feline responded, 'If Underby is fired when Tenk returns perhaps he can apply with that Tiny Scallion Group, he created some right proper anarchy last night.'

Reports of the monarch of England currently residing in New Babbage, in custody of city workers or otherwise, have as yet been unconfirmed by the Free Press, at the time of printing.  Mr O Underby was unavailable for comment.

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